“Dear Drian…”

The other day I chanced upon one of my cherished journals, which held a very memorable entry…It was a letter to my daughter on the day I’d given birth to her, sandwiched between a coloring book page that I’d painted when I was in the hospital, confined a few days before the actual delivery.

Now, two years and a month later, I was able to savor the words I wrote that captured the very essence of my emotions that very special day.

I’d written this letter to her a few hours after she was born, and it is on the very same journal that I write letters to her on our travels together, sort of like a diary or journal that I can give to her someday, to share with her just how much I love her and how excited I was (and continue to be) to let her in on everything going on in our little family’s life, and the on-goings inside my very heart.

I remember writing letters and notes to my little girl even when she was just inside my womb.  This is a good way of pouring out your feelings about pregnancy and all the rollercoaster-like emotions that go with it.  I treasure the little notebook on which I poured out my feelings, and I know someday I’d also be able to share that with Drian.

For someone who loves to document every little thing (I have a growing collection of photo albums and scrapbooks of so many memories, chronicling especially the days when my husband and I were still dating up until our wedding day, and so on and so forth…You can just imagine how many photos I’ve had to print and how many albums are taking space on my shelves right now!), I do highly recommend writing letters to your child, whether he or she is still in your womb, or whether she’s a grown teenager or still just a toddler.

It opens a world of memories especially when you get the chance of going through the letters again.  It warmed my heart reading that letter I wrote to my daughter…The very feelings I felt—overwhelming love, sheer joy, excruciating pain, incomparable fulfillment about giving birth to her all came rushing back as my eyes traveled over the words formed under my very unsteady hand (hooked up to an IV, no less) that fateful day the Lord blessed us with her.

And allow me to scratch a few lines as I write right now…

“The very same swell of emotion I rode that very day still sweeps me the same way.  And now as I look you, my child, I’d go through it all over again, that ride of highs and lows and unspeakable pain, yes, I’d go through it all again.  Now I write as I watch you sleep, with overflowing love so deep. Among the most fulfilling things I’ve ever done,…to be called your Mama is truly one.  I love you, my little precious girl, can’t wait to keep sharing with you the world.”

And so to sleep. For now.